To be Cynical is to distrust or disparage (to belittle) the motives of others. To be bitterly distrustful, contemptuous (disapproval tinged with disgust) or pessimistic. To hold a low opinion of humanity and have a strong disbelief in the sincerity of human motives. Pessimistic is even listed as synonymous to cynical.
But I suppose that about sums up how I've related to most people. I distrust them except for a select small amount. I am unsure of what motivates them and distrust their motivations. I hope i don't belittle others but sometimes I really wonder...
I really thought hard about deleting my post from yesterday, not the one about the book, the other one. I read it over and it really hit me hard, it wasn't bad writing it because I was in one of those moos whee I just write and it pours out of my head but reading it after made me feel too exposed. But who rafa my blog anyway really? I have 3 subscribers and a few other readers but I'm sure a lot of views of my blog are me. I finally set my blog to ignore any views from my phone's browser so that should fix that issue...
I decided that to delete such an honest post would defeat the purpose of keeping records of my writing. So it stays.
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